Lies we’ve all been told.

I stole this from Becca from Becoming Adorrable – I love love reading what she’s up to, and about her and husband’s adventures in Atlanta.  She posted on this the other day, and it got me thinking about lies we’ve all been told.

You have sex, and you will get pregnant.  

Mean Girls QuotesThis is one lie that has become more and more clear to me since I’ve gotten to that age where friends of mine are trying to get pregnant on purpose.  Call it a product of having my sexual education done in the south, however, my understanding was that if you have sex at any point, that you WOULD get pregnant, no questions asked.  Now imagine my surprise, that as a 27-year-old married woman, that it doesn’t always work that way.  Sometimes, when people talk about “trying,” they’re healthy, viable, and young.  They have sex on certain days, and not on others, and it still doesn’t work.

Taking on student loans is fine – you’ll get a job and be able to pay it back within like two years. 

Yeah.  Um.  I wish someone had been a little more transparent with me about this one.  The honest truth (listen up if you’re just now going to college) is that you can be like me, and you can be “underemployed” for any number of years.  You know what that means?  That means, you might be really really educated, like say, Duke educated, and that you might still pay some dues at a grocery store or in food service, trying to make ends meet while you search for something you’re really qualified for.  That said, take out as LITTLE student loan money has you can get away with.   If you can get through all four years with no debt?  You’re golden, babe!

To get the job you want, submit a resumé and a cover letter to that online form thingie, and you’ll get a call back for an interview within no time. 

The above statement is BULLSHIT.  Absolutely bullshit.  If you graduated this past weekend, hear me now when I tell you it’s bullshit.  Here’s how you get that job that you want/are qualified for.  Figure out who it is you know within that organization, stalk them to all ends of the earth, and ask them, straight up, to hook you up with an interview.  Your resumé is something that should be updated and current, this is true.  Yes, you should have a cover letter, like, around.  But hear me loud and absolutely clear when I say that networking, networking, networking, is where your head needs to be in the months leading up to you getting a job interview.  Go to dinners, luncheons, make sure you’re dressed to the nines.  At drinking things, just nurse one, take cards, and hand yours out.  Follow up the next day.  Schedule lunches and coffees with whomever it is. And never, ever feel weird about doing this.

Marriage and kids. 

I love being married.  Best thing I have ever done in my life.  I love kids.  And I think I would love to have some little boys of my own in puffy vests and in plaid shirts with little baseball hats.  But I grow tired of these folks who, for one, post things nonstop about their “perfect” lives on social media, and two, claim to never have a bad day in the world.  I had an awesome conversation with a family member (with an equally adorable baby for me to hold) who was refreshingly honest about marriage and motherhood.  She was open about her son’s reflux, about wanting to get out of the house once in a while, and about her marriage.  I loved it.  Why are we ALL not open?  All that said…

QOTD

What’s one lie you feel you’ve been told ALL your life!

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2 thoughts on “Lies we’ve all been told.

  1. Cheri, I can tell you that a lot of the posts on Facebook and social media are filtered or facades put up to try to prove how perfect their lives are. (Not always.) Case in point. A neighbor couple was always posting selfies of themselves on these amazing vacations and out for dinners and dancing. As a mom of two young boys who really can’t just jet off to far off locations, I was feeling jealous. Come to find out the pair has split and it was far from a perfect life. There was abuse and other psychological issues going on behind that beautiful facade. No one’s life is perfect, least of all mine. But, it is hard to be honest in a world of Pinterest, Facebook and Instagram perfection. Keep up your blog posts in all their honesty. I love reading them.

    1. I’ve had a similar experience recently, where I know a couple to have some pretty profound issues, and yet, to look at her social media, you would think she was married to Tom Cruise during his couch jumping days. I just can’t bring myself to lie. I have a wonderful life, but my house is a mess. Me and my husband bicker. And I’m perpetually running 5 minutes behind. Can’t lie!

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